Today starts our daily discussion of 2017’s Eurovision entries.  I will try to do one each day, though I am sure travel and work will prevent me from perfection in that department.  However, I’ll do my best.

As with last year, I will do these alphabetically.  It’s nice to have some order, and this makes it less likely that I will miss a country!  Since Armenia is a bit of a hold out on releasing their song, I will add them back in once they get with the program.

So, without further delay, let’s get started.

First up is ALBANIA:

Singer: Lindita

Song: World

Performing: First Semi-Final

Memorable Line: What’s the cost of life in this world?

Chances: Thinking about snowballs and Hell.

Link: Albania 2017

Rating: 1 boring, forgettable moaning chorus out of 10.

This song is pretty much par for the course for Albania: It is a long, wailing, miserable experience from start to finish.  Initially I hated her performance in Albanian, and now that she has released an English version, I can hate it even more.  Lindita’s accent makes it almost impossible to understand her, and her sad, screaming wail of a song is almost impossible to listen to.

And then, let’s talk about the performance.  The only word to describe it is “boring” — at least in the video I have seen, she just stands there and wails, with no thought to staging, presence, or connecting with the audience.  I guess she does play with her ear at one point and bounces up and down.  Her singing is even masked by music that is too loud, so we can’t even get a sense of whether she can really moan on key.  It’s just bad, bad, bad!

The song has nothing memorable at all.  It is just bad bad bad from the moment it starts until, mercifully, Lindita wraps up her performance after 3 minutes, never to be heard from again.

I always hope Albania will surprise me.  Unfortunately, they rarely do.  The problem is that their tastes must be so far removed from the rest of Europe (and the world) that what they see is an amazing number just ends up passing for noise.  This song will be a good time to go use the euphemism or get a drink.

I renew my plea: Albania, please make me love you someday!

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